Don’t Assume

We sometimes build our own cages through assumptions or the opinions and assumptions of others.  Then we lock ourselves in them and rail at fate for making us a victim.  It’s a survival trait to put our energy into what we know will work.  No use wasting energy on possibilities when we know we can…

Give Yourself What You Need

Focus is a very good thing. Being able to channel our energy and resources and attention into the actions necessary to achieve a goal is crucial to making our dreams a reality.  Or to getting the bills paid and keeping food on the table.  And anything in between if it comes to that.  This can…

When Do Things Go Bad?

So many of us hope for and work for positive change in our lives.  We dream of the day when money isn’t a struggle, when we aren’t surrounded by people who treat us badly, when we are free to be who we truly are, when we can live the life we are meant to… and…

So What Does It Take?

Change happens. It’s the only constant in the universe.  I’ve heard so many people say that people don’t change but of course they do.  They change all the time.  They have experiences, they interact with an every changing universe, they are who they are and in every moment they are becoming more.  So what does…

When Are You No Longer Expendable?

Hopefully each of us will come to a point where we will stay “enough.”  So much of our lives is about being told that other priorities are more important than ours.  The boss, the bank, the company, the government, our parents, our children, everyone else’s opinion and needs and desires require our attention and efforts. …

It’s An Ancient Practice

In religious and spiritual communities it is common to hear that this or that practice is thousands of years old.  This is said to give the practice gravitas, authority, show that it’s time tested and incontrovertibly good for you.  In the same way that organic food is better than regularly farmed and ranched food.  However,…

I Want To Be Treated Better

I can’t think of anyone that doesn’t want to be treated well.   Of course, I don’t know all the billions of people in the world so I’m not the best judge of all the possibilities in the world, but in general, the people I interact with nationally and internationally all express a desire to be…

I’m Passing

“People don’t know.  They see me as normal.  I don’t want them to know what I really am…..I’m so lonely…”  Yep, there is a correlation.  To be known you have to be seen.  To be seen you have to actually act as if you are who you really are.  You have to be open to…

Rebuilding Trust

Trust is a huge issue for lots of us out there, but not the way you might think and usually not the way people talk about it.  There are lots of conversations and books and therapists and clergy out in the world telling us that we need to trust others.  We need to trust their…

They’re All I’ve Got

As a writer it’s interesting to me to note the way people talk about things, the words they choose and how they use them.  Like when discussing family.  The word family almost always means family of origin.  When someone is talking about their spouse or their kids, that’s what they call them.  They don’t speak…