We have certain categories of thieves, stereotypes if you will, that we like to put people in: Wall Street fraudster, poor/drug addict/street trash, and grifter. We think of these people as “out there” in the world. Other people have to deal with them, we don’t. They are wonderful for crime procedurals, movies, and the occasional…
There’s a difference between excuses and choices and it’s in where the responsibility lands. An excuse explains to someone why the person is acting or not acting the way they are and places the responsibility on someone or something else. A choice explains to someone why they made a decision to act one way or…
It’s common for my clients to want to understand what is going on with them. They have a problem and they want a solution. Often they understand the situation, they understand how they got to this place and they understand what they should be doing and what should work, but they can’t or it doesn’t. …
There are some common themes that I point out to people who are in a relationship (married/living together/long-term committed) that they sometimes over look. One is that a relationship is a bit like walking. If someone is really moving forward in their life, being challenged, growing, having personal issues, then the other isn’t. Not that…
I remember one particular evening. I was deep into my studies with the elders of my people and studying with others who has niche knowledge in specific areas at which I was becoming adept. Doing a lot of study and personal work stirs things up. Change and becoming is often a messy process. As a…
The concept of a guilty pleasure is that it’s something we shouldn’t want, shouldn’t indulge in, yet we do. We should be better than this/that/the other but we’re not. So we indulge in private or incognito separating out how we want to be seen from who we really are. Sometimes it’s separating out who we…
People think that being a contortionist requires a physical aptitude or quirk of nature, talent and a lot of practice. Which is true if you’re wanting to be part of Cirque Du Soleil. What most people don’t realize is that they are natural contortionists. They put themselves through mental gymnastics all the time. It can…
It seems as if we’re really uncomfortable with the being of something. I’ve been noticing this recently. If someone is enjoying something other people get uncomfortable and need to insert themselves, often in a negative way. This is a common theme in the world of geekdom where people spend a great deal of time energy…
I’m pro long term goal. I don’t have a problem with a dream that’s going to take elbow grease and time and navigation. I like big dreams and I will not lie….ahem. Never mind. However, life isn’t a long term goal. One of the reasons that New Year’s resolutions fail is that we’re setting long…
On one end of the pendulum swing there’s the top out point of nothing and then on the other there’s the top out point of everything. In between the two there’s all the stuff that’s well…in between. Somewhere in there, sometimes in the exact middle and sometimes not, there’s just the right mix not only…