It’s amazing how much our priorities mandate how our days will play out. Not just in what we do, but in how we do them, and how they create or detract from our quality of life. Making ourselves the last in priority ranking guarantees that things will go against us. It’s not that the things…
Relationships can be confusing. So much is being said in so many ways: between the lines, meta message, spoken/unspoken/inferred, and physically. Plus we’re letting someone into our sacrosanct space where we are vulnerable which makes everything mean more, carry more weight, be freighted with meaning. We are combining our entire world including all that goes…
Any relationship is full of negotiation. People point to compromise as a major component and there is that too, but if that’s all there was then relationships wouldn’t be positive or nurturing or even healthy. They would be political and a means to control negative behaviors and consequences. It would be two people in a…
Sins of omission. What gets left unsaid is just as telling as what is said. When we think of things left unsaid it’s either in a sad way, usually after someone has died or at the ending of a relationship we wish had gone a different way, or after an argument when all the witty…
Disappointment is a thing. It happens. It’s normal and part of living. We wanted an event or a thing to meet our expectations. We needed the party to be fun, we need our new car to actually work, we were expecting that new gadget we bought to work with all our other gadgets, we really…
As adults one of the things, hopefully, that we’ve learned rather quickly is that we need to get all the “need to” things done before we do the “want to’s.” I’m not talking about the “should’s” I’m pointing out that the needs really need to get met like having water on hand (if nothing else…
“Do what I say or I will have feels!” We’ve all been in this conversation before. Either it’s the emotional blackmail of being told not to do something because if you do it will hurt them and the crushing nature of that sadness/despair/agony will destroy everything! Absolutely EVERYTHING! Or its the don’t do or be…
You know that phrase “You hear what you expect to hear?” It goes along with the seeing what you want to see but it’s a little different. In one aspect it’s really helpful. Language has patterns. Both in how it’s formed and how it expresses things, ie. context. So if you miss a couple of…
People ask me if Native American’s have a tradition of doing cleanses. The simple answer: Nope. The complete answer: native people’s didn’t have a notion of 3 square meals a day plus snacks. Food was what you cultivated, harvested, or hunted and then prepared. There would be days where there was less or none. Plains…
No one wants to feel bad. Not only is it not fun, but our bodies are hard wired to avoid it because feeling bad causes us to be vulnerable which means the huge saber tooth tiger will sneak up on us and we won’t be able to heft that spear to defend ourselves….really, that’s what…