Life is full of obstacles. Whether or not you believe that these things happen for a reason or the world is completely random, nothing ever goes smooth. If it did we’d be looking around to find out what was wrong or who was setting us up for a “gotcha” type surprise. However, we are problem solving machines. Our brains are wired to help us figure things out so we can get through the obstacles and beyond them to the goal. Hence we learned to make tools and build shelter and make clothes and grow food…then we invented Google which tells us how to do all that stuff so we can focus on what’s really important, social media. LOL I crack myself up.
But anyway. So there are obstacles and we need to change and adapt and figure things out to get beyond them. But one of the biggest obstacles we have is ourselves. The way we think about things, about the world, about ourselves often and with regularity is the very issue that is causing the obstacles we’re facing. The choice we make because of how we think sets us up for failure time and again. Having issues with one or both of your parents? Instead of dealing with it we recreate the same dynamic over and over again in our workplace or with our significant other or both so the problem never ends and never gets better. Have needs and wants and desires? Why take care of them yourself when you can live with someone who will fill them for you so you can focus on other things. Of course they don’t and so all your relationships fail. Have a sense of self where you’re failure and can’t succeed at anything? Well then set up goals that are impossible, seek perfection that is unattainable, then work harder than everyone else, achieve amazing things, ignore all the successes and focus on the very small failures, concede that you’re a failure, withdraw from the battle field, then pick another one and start again.
The hardest thing to change is how we think, not just about ourselves, but about the world and our place in it. I’m not talking about needing a couple of positive affirmations, but to truly invest in changing how we perceive the world. Taking off the blinders, getting rid of old narratives, letting go of habits that are so ragged there’s hardly anything left we’ve used them so often, and starting to explore who we really are. If we can let go of the old thought patterns, the one that are worn out and stinky like gym shoes that aren’t worth wearing one more time, then we can start to find new ones that allow us to truly experience the world.
