Addictions are a difficult subject because the knee jerk reaction is to say, well just stop doing *addiction* and everything will be resolved. But if it were that simple then they wouldn’t be addictions, would they. They would just be habits or quirks of character that no one would worry about much and would go away eventually. So then the matter gets more serious and problem solving starts to happen. And the choices really are A. treat the symptoms and punish the addict B. treat the underlying issue and try to heal the addict while cleaning up after the symptoms and all the blowback from them. Neither of which is easy, foolproof, or affective the first, fifth, or twentieth time they are attempted. Better to not get addicted to anything at all if you can help it.
However, the true underlying issue is a combination of these two things we are taught from birth: People never change and something is wrong with you. If these two statements are true, then addiction is our just reward for being ‘wrong’ in some way and as we can’t change there’s nothing we can do about it and the whole thing is hopeless. However both of those statements are unequivocally wrong. People DO change. If they didn’t they would never grow up, never become parents, never learn anything, never get wiser or sillier (depending on which you find more important in life) and never die. If we didn’t change there would be no reason to be here because the essence of experience is change.
And as for there being something wrong with you, how could there be? God does not create mistakes. Let me say that again. God does not create mistakes. She got it right the first time. You are not flawed and not missing anything. You are exactly who you are supposed to be. Addiction is not a punishment for failure. It is a response to situations and choices and you most certainly can choose to do things differently. You can choose to ask for help, start a program, get advice, talk to a friend, reach out in some way to make things just slightly different from how they have been so that the situation improves and you are one step farther from the addictive substance or behavior.
People can change because they are not wrong or broken. Not that its easy, but it can be done. You are perfect just as you are and there is help. Let yourself reach out for it.
